Medical Slang: How doctors insult their patients and each other.

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The terms by which physicians insult patients and each other.

 
homersbrain.gifMore insulting terms for patients, diagnosis, and general physician slang.

Terms for physicians:

 

  • Acades vulgaris - medical students.
  • Adminisphere - where hospital managers work, reckoned to be "another planet"
  • Ax(e) - surgeon
  • Blade - Surgeon: dashing, bold, arrogant and often wrong, but never in doubt
  • Blood Suckers - those who take blood samples, e.g. lab techs
  • Bones and Groans - non-specialist general hospital
  • BoneHo - an off-service resident working in Orthopedics
  • C&T Ward - Coma ward - "cabbages and turnips"
  • C_nts and Runts - Maternity and Paediatrics
  • Captain Kangaroo - head of a paediatrics department
  • Freud Squad - psychiatry department
  • Gasser, gas passer, gas man, Gaswallah - anaesthetist
  • Slasher - surgeon
  • Short-order chef - morgue worker
  • Knuckledragger - orthopedist
  • Overpriced Carpenter - orthopedist
  • Orthopod - orthopedist
  • Flea - internal medicine doctor
  • Humpty-dumpty doctor - a physiatrist or rehabilitation physician; referring to verse from the popular nursery rhyme that "all the king's horses and all the king's men could not put humpty together again."
  • Stream team - the urology service collectively
  • Pecker checker / Cock Doc- urologist
  • Pediatron - paediatrician
  • Baby catcher - obstetrician
  • Rear Admiral - proctologist
  • Unclear medicine - nuclear medicine
  • BoneHo - off-service resident working on Orthopedic service
  • Osteopath - D.O., Doctor of Osteopathy--a physician licenced to practice medicine and surgery who is trained in osteopathic medicine
  • Hearts and Farts - unit specialising in geriatrics and cardiology
  • Inbreds - doctors whose parents are also doctors
  • Larry - Locum, as in "doing a Larry"
  • Raisin Farm - old person's home, geriatric ward etc (also Raisin Farmer - person who runs old persons' home)
  • Removal men - dept of care of elderly people
  • Rheumaholiday - rheumatology (considered by hard-pressed juniors to be a less busy dept)
  • Shadow gazer - radiologist
  • Sieve - a doctor who admits almost every patient he sees
  • Cath Jockey - A cardiologist that catheterizes every patient they see. Or one that does cardiac catherizations.

Hey, I didn't make these up. Many are not even included due to good taste.If you have been insulted by a medical proffesional speak to Alexander Harris and find out more about clinical negligence.