Medical Slang: How doctors insult their patients and each other.

The terms by which physicians insult patients and each other.

homersbrain.gifMore insulting terms for patients, diagnosis, and general physician slang.

Terms for physicians:


  • Acades vulgaris - medical students.
  • Adminisphere - where hospital managers work, reckoned to be "another planet"
  • Ax(e) - surgeon
  • Blade - Surgeon: dashing, bold, arrogant and often wrong, but never in doubt
  • Blood Suckers - those who take blood samples, e.g. lab techs
  • Bones and Groans - non-specialist general hospital
  • BoneHo - an off-service resident working in Orthopedics
  • C&T Ward - Coma ward - "cabbages and turnips"
  • C_nts and Runts - Maternity and Paediatrics
  • Captain Kangaroo - head of a paediatrics department
  • Freud Squad - psychiatry department
  • Gasser, gas passer, gas man, Gaswallah - anaesthetist
  • Slasher - surgeon
  • Short-order chef - morgue worker
  • Knuckledragger - orthopedist
  • Overpriced Carpenter - orthopedist
  • Orthopod - orthopedist
  • Flea - internal medicine doctor
  • Humpty-dumpty doctor - a physiatrist or rehabilitation physician; referring to verse from the popular nursery rhyme that "all the king's horses and all the king's men could not put humpty together again."
  • Stream team - the urology service collectively
  • Pecker checker / Cock Doc- urologist
  • Pediatron - paediatrician
  • Baby catcher - obstetrician
  • Rear Admiral - proctologist
  • Unclear medicine - nuclear medicine
  • BoneHo - off-service resident working on Orthopedic service
  • Osteopath - D.O., Doctor of Osteopathy--a physician licenced to practice medicine and surgery who is trained in osteopathic medicine
  • Hearts and Farts - unit specialising in geriatrics and cardiology
  • Inbreds - doctors whose parents are also doctors
  • Larry - Locum, as in "doing a Larry"
  • Raisin Farm - old person's home, geriatric ward etc (also Raisin Farmer - person who runs old persons' home)
  • Removal men - dept of care of elderly people
  • Rheumaholiday - rheumatology (considered by hard-pressed juniors to be a less busy dept)
  • Shadow gazer - radiologist
  • Sieve - a doctor who admits almost every patient he sees
  • Cath Jockey - A cardiologist that catheterizes every patient they see. Or one that does cardiac catherizations.

Hey, I didn't make these up. Many are not even included due to good taste.If you have been insulted by a medical proffesional speak to Alexander Harris and find out more about clinical negligence.