FDA Gives Approval For Three Breast Augmentation
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A number of main stream news organizations are reporting today that the FDA is suspending the need for medical injectables (like Restylane and Juvederm) from being approved before they're used.
AND they're going to allow third breast implants. (see image)
In a reversal of a long-standing rule against using anything that's not FDA approved for medical care, physicians (and presumably otheres since this removes injectables from FDA approval) can inject anything they want.
According to a statement provided by FDA spokesperson April Fulton:
There have been a number of cases where individuals with psychological problems have injected themselves with materials that include industrial silicon or even battery acid since they couldn't find a physician that would treat them. This regulatory change will allow patients who want to be injected with battery acid to find a physician who can perform this service rather than trying to do it themselves.
With the economy in termoil, many price concious consumers can't affort the cosmetic name brands like Botox, Restylane, and Juvederm, now they can access substitutes. We're looking to allow competition in a protected market that benefits consumers. Now, you can get injected with beef-stick if you want.
In addition, plastic surgeons will now be able to offer third breast implants. These treatments have been popular oversees (especially in Europe) but are now going to be availabe in the US. Expect to spend much more on bikinis. Three pocket bras are already appearing on eBay.
... Three breast augmentation has been show to have no greater statistical risk than single breast augmentation. It's been the norm in parts of Europe for years and we're not looking to penalize American plastic surgeons who could be performing these surgeries instead of having patients go oversees.
This is terrible. Don't be surprised if you find day spas or even oil change franchises jumping with both feet into 'medical' treatments now that the FDA is dropping filler injections as a regulatory body. Even hair salons will be able to provide 'beef-stick injections' or anything else they want without any regulator oversight and no one seems to have thought of the ramifications to clothing retailers and others of having to provide for a third breast.
To quote Ghostbusters, '“Dogs and Cats Living Together, MASS HYSTERIA!”
Plastic surgery gone wrong?! Speak to Irwin Mitchell about a medical negligence claim.
Reader Comments (6)
Jeff: Quoting another movie line - from the Arnold Swarzeneggar "classic" TOTAL RECALL -- "I wish I had THREE hands!"
Happy April Fool's Day!
Laughing so much that I'm crying and can barely type. THAT is funny.
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Good god, writer, learn to spell. TWICE in this article you wrote "oversees" instead of "overSEAS."
Well, if three isn't enough you can always have four like this woman: http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,588846,00.html?test=latestnews